A Moment of Solitude

Shenmue: Memories of Iwao

Memories. Reflection. That’s what this song is about. I am sailing a daunting voyage across a vast ocean with no land around in me in sight, awaiting the appearance of a speck of land which will indicate that I am close to Destiny. But now the air grows chilly, the tides turbulent, and the night darker and foggier. I detach the sail from my ship, and my vessel gently glides to a stop, giving me a chance to look around.

Where to go from here? I can hear from a distance the sweet notes of past times and happy memories, smiling people and faces, magical places and circumstances. A sorrowful weight of lead sits at the bottom of my heart as I remember, as everything comes back to me. The lessons. The laughs. The difficult times. The absurdities. Even the challenges and unbearable things of the past…they too seem like distant friends to me now, friends who have bid me farewell and stood at the shore looking after me as I set sail for a far away land. And not until that moment did I see in their eyes a sort of familiarity – the culmination of all the days we spent together, happy and painful – never before was it so transparent. Their eyes also displayed the sadness of parting, but also a strong resolution on my behalf, that I was to go forth and make conquests elsewhere.

But every now and then, when the wind changes direction and picks up speed, and the clouds briefly obscure the moon, I wonder about the twisted route that Destiny has mapped for me. The subtle but vital clues that have been scattered throughout several different continents. The hints and leads that I must piece together to ultimately figure out where I am going. Why do I see the wrecks of so many other ships that sailed here before me? Was it nothing more than their loss of direction that destroyed them? Or was it their obsession with landing at Destiny’s shore that made them forget to steer properly, leading to their demise?

A sobering reflection. But as I feel the ocean breeze across my face and I glance at the twinkling stars, the power of faith is renewed within me, and I allow the winds at my back to set the ship in motion once more. I stand at the bow, resuming my cautious look out for friend or foe on the horizon. But in a strange way, I appreciate this moment of silence and solitude for the time being.

The Eleven Plus Forces of Inspiration

El Condor Pasa

I was reflecting on the key elements in my life that provide inspiration. I’ve been studying the cause and effect relationship between everyday phenomena and their links to the “spiritual world” or the workings of higher forms of intelligence. In other words, when you are moved by a deeply inspiring piece of music, how is this similar/different to when you are captivated by the beauty of a majestic sunset? My incomplete theory (which is not at all unique) is that these, and an infinite number of other phenomena are unified under the spiritual sphere (that which transcends our five physical senses). I do not believe in a single, conscious entity called God – man has misused and polluted this concept throughout history. But I have another name for that which “God” was originally intended to represent, in its full purity: Profundity.

I’ve attempted to place the forces of inspiration in my own life, as I perceive them, into roughly ten categories (actually eleven). It’s certainly not a complete list, and is not in any particular order. It obviously differs from the list that any other person would generate.

1. Flying (aviation)
Including learning to fly, traveling by plane, the experience of flying, dreaming about flying and spaceflight.

2. Video Games
Most notably: Shenmue, Zelda (Link to the Past and others), Mario (Mario Galaxy, 64, NES games, etc.), WarioWare, DS, many others. Also includes the music from these games.

3. The Nature of Mankind
And our place in this world, and our ever-increasing ability to answer questions about ourselves and this universe. Also includes conquests, triumphs, and amazing endeavours and feats by individuals or by groups of humans throughout history. Also, specific philosophies and systems of belief invented by man loosely fall in this category, such as Buddhism, and the Law of Attraction.

4. Relationships with Others
Friends and family, and the nature of each unique relationship as a new “being” or entity in itself that is born and reborn many times in many different forms.

5. Weather
Weather phenomena, including rain, clouds, sunshine, snow, etc. The beauty of these phenomena and the nature of change itself as exhbited by weather.

6. Music
Ranging from: songs from my favorite bands, to other completely random songs, to music themes for movies, cartoons, and video games, to classical music and so on…

7. Profound Works of Fiction
Films or books that have been deeply inspiring, ranging from 101 Dalmatians to Catch-22, to the Graduate. The essence distilled in these works that produce a unique feeling.

8. Technology and Science
Such things as lasers, physics, computers, robots, modern forms of transportation, biology (especially
the human mind and body), etc. Mathematics also holds a prominent position in this category. Nature also falls in this category: i.e. the stars, space, the ocean, the mountains, the moon, etc.

9. Traveling by train
Includes subways, rapid transits, and long railroad journeys. Pleasure roadtrips can also be placed in this category.

10. Animals
Animal behavior and cuteness found in mammals, such as cats, dogs, marsupials, etc. Also the intricacies of animal life (example: the behavior of ant colonies). Overlaps with #7 (science).

11. Reflection and Introspection
On topics such as the nature of life, the nature of being and self, as well as such explorations into the profundity of this world as this one. Attempting to understand myself and my own journey in terms of those who came before me, those who are my contemporaries, and those who are fictional but still important (such as Ryo Hazuki from the video game Shenmue or Luke Skywalker from Star Wars).

Interlude

There are those of us who have always looked towards  the skies for inspiration. The vast expanse of deep blue holds promises of wild and magical adventures to those seeking to escape earthly sorrows. The fluffy white clouds drift carelessly above, continuously being molded into new shapes by the hand of a profoundly sloppy and unpredictable sculptor hovering over the earth’s surface. Are they ever lonely? Are the “heavens” above really a separate and forbidden zone, a sphere of isolation and dark, murky mystery to us ordinary humans? Or are they a place for delightful encounters, ultimate freedom and extraordinary passion, and fantastic adventures for those who brave the risk? A thousand tales of love, hope, and inspiration are waiting to be told.

 

A profound moment of friendship in the skies.

Smells like Crickets, Tastes like Chicken

Age of Empires II Soundtrack

Why do I always provide links to video game music in my blog? Am I that much of a geek? Well, there’s the short answer (yes) and the long answer to that. You see, when you’re playing a video game like The Legend of Zelda or Age of Empires II, you’re focused on the mission or task at hand, whether it be saving the princess and slaying three-headed dragons, or launching a ground offensive against the enemy. Sometimes you just can’t consciously focus on the music. But it’s there, and your subconscious mind is totally digging it while you’re owning Agahnim with his own evil magic energy by reflecting it with your master sword.

What am I getting at? Sometimes video game music speaks straight to the heart, because of its simplicity. There’s immense profundity…in its simplicity. This particular song is called, “Smells like Crickets, Tastes Like Chicken.” Why is it called that? I have no idea! But who really cares? When I listen to this, my heart lightens as I recall the many hours I spent building my civilization (I usually played as the Japanese), raising an army, and setting out on major conquests. I don’t think words – I think feelings, and nostalgia. That’s the point, words aren’t important with this type of music. I have appropriated the music as something special connected with my past; hence it’s a part of me, and no one else will hear the same thing I do when I listen to it.

But music is not just about the past. This song not only makes me nostalgic and remember my virtual conquests on the PC, but it lights a spark, and sells a bigger inspiration. An inspiration to conquer my dreams with the same determination and courage as the brave general who conquered his enemy in an epic battle. And forever behold and absorb this beautiful process of growth and learning known as life.

I am the Captain of my Soul

Bowser’s Road

Here’s to the power that permeates the matter of this universe, infinite and indomitable. Here’s to the force that can move mountains, conquer the skies, and control the direction of the winds. It is a power “greater than all of our fears and superstitions combined,” in the words of Napoleon Hill. When I hear the music that is the product of this power, when I see the people who have against all odds triumphed and harnessed the intangible forces of the ether, I smile, and in that moment, I am unafraid. I am unafraid of the tallest heights and the steepest trails. My soul is a vessel, and I do not fear the darkest, deepest waters I must traverse. I am unmoved by the snapping jaws and the sharp teeth that others may call “dangerous.” I shall follow the light in my heart ’till the end, and give no thought to the limitations existing in the mind of the common man.

Something Elusive and Temporary

Sugar – Ladytron

I’ve learned from past experiences that happiness really is around the corner. That’s because happy times are the product of chemical rushes and neurotransmitter level patterns in our brain, and these patterns result from the perception of specific conditions surrounding us that are hard-coded into our minds to make us happy. Sometimes being in one place, with one or more persons, during one time in your life can result in joy and ecstasy, while a different situation and setting can leave serious negative and even traumatic imprints on your mind. But the really funny thing is that the intensity of the emotions we felt during a particular time become most clear and apparent once our circumstances have changed, as they always do.

 And so this is life: continually entering new periods associated with new places, things, people – and most importantly, new memories coupled with strong emotional cores that will go on to either bring us sadness, happiness, or nostalgia in the future. It’s both a beautiful and horrifying thing that the world, to each of us, is our own mind’s creation. But as there is no possibility of reviving or chasing down and replicating a former state of emotion, I conclude that we ought to pay attention to the budding emotional “trap” that is likely forming in each of our lives right now, the trap that may consume us in the future. If it’s a pit of desolation, then take heart and have no doubt that happiness is waiting to arise and stage its grand comeback. And if it’s happiness, then squeeze every drop out of it and savor every moment of it, because it’s sure to change shape again very soon.

Jammin’

Bob Marley – Jammin’

A good friend of mine had a t-shirt that read, “Music is a force of nature.” I think about this beautiful metaphor every time I listen to an uplifting song, a passionate melody, or an emotional piece of music. If I was ever a pure rationalist, my life and views have been drastically altered by the power of music. To create music, to share and inspire with it – such is a gift of humankind whose full and mysterious nature penetrates beyond the physical world into the realm of the spiritual.

Seriously. To think that a song sung from one’s soul and heart could come to epitomize another’s message or purpose in life. But I hear it in Bob Marley’s voice – life is worth much more than gold. And one of my deepest desires in life is to be surrounded by those who recognize this, and who are not afraid to part with the purely rational, mechanical, robotic, sensible half of the world every now and then and dance around a bonfire and sing their hearts out in tribute to the vast, the unknown, the holiness of the Infinite. In this sense, music has been empowering for me, even a defining force in my life. Because to listen to such a song, and feel in my gut, “this song is about me, my place in the world, and my role in humanity” really is an experience not to be taken lightly. If you stick to your rationalist notions and find this silly, we will always be strangers at heart. But understand this, and you will not find understanding me much harder.

To think that jamming was a thing of the past!

Shifting Sand Land (Baked in a Desert)

Mario 64: Shifting Sand Land/Lethal Lava Land Theme

If I could be Mario for just one hour, I would delve into the treacherous depths of Shifting Sand Land, from Super Mario 64. For those delicious scorching yellow pools of quicksand, the marvelous golden pyramid of untold evils whose insides are rich with the stench of death and animated violence, and those frightful thwomp-like blocks which bear eternal expressions of anguish and madness as they strive to squash you to a pulp – they all have been permanently etched in my subconscious storage of happy, fantastic imaginary lands. If I could only go there, for real this time, just once! I’d spread my arms and precess like a graceful spinning top as I lightly glide across the burning blue sky. I’d feel the comforting hot blasts of rich golden sand upon my face as I come face to face with the turbulent whirlwhinds of the desert. And as long as my whole body has not been seized and swallowed by the quicksand, I would continue to enjoy my escape from reality into a magical world that has perhaps been more significant to me since my childhood than any real place in the real world.

Whence this Stream Within You, Young One?

I can’t deny the difficulty of attempting to impart the same emotions and feelings associated with my experiences to you, the reader, using words. In fact, I’d say it is damn near impossible to make you completely understand the significance of anything I’ve written in this blog. For I strive continually to dig up the right words and imagery to convey to you that stream of consciousness that flows somewhere deep down and undefinable. Somewhere of boundless personal significance, somewhere sacred. If you look within yourself, you’ll find the channels of this stream that penetrate your entire being, and water every aspect of your life, and extend to every inch of your past. You perhaps recognize it in the form of Nostalgia – and in knowing this, you see that the unique images, sounds, music and feelings that characterize this particular set of memories can be fully relevant to you only.

Therefore, what is the use of my trying to make you understand? Perhaps nothing. Maybe it’s more to help me on my quest to define this abstract and wonderful realm by attempting to put it into words. For this is the mysterious realm through which life takes on meaning. As a good friend once remarked quite profoundly, “Through time and space, thoughts are the only real things…”

Mayuka’s Theme

A Divine Colossus Boldly Presents Itself

Shenmue Theme Song

This is the melody that resonates from my soul as I gently put the violin bow to the strings of my heart. This is the quintessential message of my life in the form of an epic novel, the recurring and eternal theme. This is what I hear and live and struggle and smile and cry. This is me perched upon a grand mountaintop, beholding a majestic and serene sunset blanketing the gold and green cushion of this overwhelming world before me, as I gaze at the many other snowy crystal mountains that I have yet to conquer. This is my strength.

Enough said.